Keywords:
bridge,engineering,spain,morocco,africa,europe,mrl
Secret Squirrel applies his brilliant engineering genius to a futuristic Africa Europe bridge project.
Secret Squirrel Critiques A Formerly Secret Project,
The Spain Morocco Bridge...........
Note the comments of Secret Squirrel, there noted as being between brackets,braces or whatever you prefer to call those () things.......as in this fashion......(etc xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx etc)......
Strait of Gibraltar Bridge Project
United States architect, Eugene Tsui,.... (seem he's really a Chinese)... has designed the longest bridge in the world spanning the Strait of Gibraltar and connecting the continents of Europe and Africa.At present,though, this is just imaginary, cloud talk as it were,however we shall look at it severely and critique the project from engineering and financial aspects. Now this revolutionary design does not resemble any existing bridge and features an original floating and submerging tunnel type concept...
(Ha! Not a bridge at all then,I can detect a fake project, a money laundering scheme of immense proportions,money laundered in the waters of the Mediterranean,a dream,so much water under the bridge)...
while creating a three mile wide floating island in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea....
(floating island indeed, does England float,does the Isle Of Mann float, does the Isle of Wight float?Nay! Islands don't float,proven fact,floating islands,he'll be trying to float loans to build this).....
From this newly created island a person could view both the European and African continents for the first time in human history....
(who really wants to gaze at Afrique from Spain, and whom in Spain wants to gaze at Afrique?)......
When construction begins it would be the biggest architectural project in the world—and the most ecological—dwarfing Three Gorges Dam in China and Ground Zero in New York City-- and would instantly become the greatest tourist destination on Earth....
(Now what form of village idiot would want to see a bridge,not even Frenchman take holidays to see a bridge)....
Spanning about 9 miles the 14.5 kilometer floating bridge contains 150 windmills and 80 underwater tidal turbines generating 12 billion kilowatt hours of electricity. Windmills and turbines can be easily added to the design as needed...
(Well, to do what may I ask,was supposed to be a bridge,now they're trying to claim it's some form of electrical generation power project,getting in to the realms of grandiose fantasy here)...
The bridge can generate enough electricity to power the southern Spanish province of Cadiz and the entire nation of Morocco making it the largest wind and water power farm in the world...
(one immediately notices that they don't want to do this, power the Spanish province of Cadiz, and the entire nation of Morocco,seems this plan may just be a guise to tell'em to go suck oranges)......
This feature allows the bridge to pay for itself many times over in electrical generation not to mention tourist dollars....
(This doesn't do England not a spot of good,Britain will get none of it, Britain will have none of it)....
This is the first truly viable design in a long history of attempting to connect both continents.....
(Nay, a child can do it, simply draw a line or two across, and color it in, job's done, seen it done hundreds of times, they do it everyday, nothing new there, and doesn't cost a pence,viable design, designs work for children too, but just wait till they try build it).....
The design utilizes the natural current flow of the Strait and its constant winds and does not disturb the existing ecology and marine life of the site...
(Current flow?Current flow? The Mediterranean's been filled in for centuries, it's like a bowl,it can't hold any more, and none flows out as it's all at sea level, level mind! And, staying in reality and strictly on the level, current flow? The bridge,any bridge, is unlikely to be able to reverse current flow in any river,lake,stream,gorge or as we have it,the Mediterranean Sea,utilizes natural current flow, can hardly effect it one way or the other,imbecility at best,he's reduced to smoke screen effects to impress people, not impressed, utterly irrelevant......)......
Cost to build the bridge is ten billion U.S. dollars and would be a joint governmental partnership between Morocco, France and Spain....
(Ha! U.S. dollars! Spain has Pesos or some such, France has Francs-hot dogs-and Morocco has Moroccans.......dollars indeed, U.S. dollars no less,whenever THEY steal, it's in U.S. dollars, one can see a financial plot in the making,fraud,embezzlement...no doubt for the floating island, I bet there's a plan to install bilk pumps).
The bridge is designed to float gracefully on and under the water........
(Under the water..... yes, it'll sink,they're planning ahead, for when it sinks.built in to the design they say,built to do that,that's most definitely a slip there)......
like a giant, elegant serpent....
(serpent---child like idiotic dream state fantasy emerging,serpents swim off you know,there are none in my bathtub anymore, they swam off when I hit 6 years old)...
anchored to the cities of Tarifa on the southern coast of Spain to Point Cires on the northern tip of Morocco....
(anchored,anchored,indeed,to keep it floating off?T'is a bridge...it won't float, the idea won't float, and all that will float, is they off with the investment money,that'll float off, reminds me I must by a life preserver vest before the board meeting)......
The first mile of the bridge extends out from the coast line and then gradually slopes under the Mediterranean for two miles at a maximum depth of 200 meters or 658 feet...
(Yes, they're introducing that sinking feeling, won't hold water, just like the U.S. Big Dig Boston tunnel which leaks,the chunnel which also leaks, in fact they've yet to build a tunnel under water which doesn't leak)....
The bridge then slopes upward to a center floating island of three miles in length and continues down underwater again to slope up and come out onto the neighboring continent. The design allows very large ships to pass unimpeded within a four mile width where the bridge is submerged and leaves marine currents undisturbed...
(It'll never work, we've got Frenchman and Germans all at sea, look at the sunken wreck in the English Channel, in broad daylight, with 15 miles of Channel to the side of it and they hit the wreck, they'll hit this thing for sure)....
Eugene Tsui’s Strait of Gibraltar Floating Bridge, as a tourist attraction, would potentially double Spain’s 50 million annual tourists...
(seasonal cockroaches and summer locusts don't count as tourists in Britain)....
and significantly increase Morocco’s current 2.3 million annual tourists to a whopping 60 million....
(that'd be vermin and lice brought in by French diplomats,and Whoppings indeed,how will they afford the trip in the first place?)...,
a potential increase of 2600% or 26 times the current annual influx.......
(probably means nobody's coming presently and anything would help Spanish tourism.....).....
This amounts to over 8 billion U.S. dollars to each country annually...
(the Americans decided not to give the money to the drowned New Orleans natives,nor spend it on proper levees.......errr.........dykes.......may prefer spending on Washington dykes,local talent and some such,be money much better spent there)....
not to mention the significant increase in tourism to both continents......
(Interesting, people moving about constitutes tourism, we simply must get'em off the benches in Hyde Park,American tourism figures must shoot up with each New Orleans hurricane,yes I can see the travel posters now, Visit Spain!Visit Morocco!See a Bridge!).........oh grand that will be ,yes.........).....
In other words, Tsui’s bridge design has the potential to jump start the entire economy of north Africa and possibly the entire African continent in one project. No doubt it would be the Eighth Wonder Of The World....
(Spain and Morocco having an economy would do that?It's true, we've never seen'em work at it,or anything else for that matter)........
What about traffic congestion for the 60 or more million travelers who will cross the bridge?...
(Can't possibly fit that many,can't fit 60 Million in the colony of Canada,and who'd want to live there, notice there just aren't that many, how'd they fit on a bridge,just no room for'em to thrash about.).....
There are 24 lanes total for motor vehicle traffic.....
(yes! And my rocket design had room for 6 million pounds of food);
8 lanes for automobile traffic in each direction and 4 lanes for trucks and buses
(Busing, this I understand, but trucking, surely we aren't yet allowed to do that in public)....
4 standard train tracks and 2 high speed trains complete the motor vehicle accommodations
(Idiocy here, motor vehicle , wouldn't need any having roadways,more evidence of fake design plans)...
In addition, 5 elevated 30 meter wide pedestrian lanes accommodate people who wish to walk, bicycle, ride camels and horses
(14.5kilometers,to walk,nobody would walk that,clearly a fake plan).......
Lush gardens, trees, flowers, waterfalls, rest areas and drinking fountains surround all pedestrian areas....
(The Hanging Gardens of Babylon,yes, and an army of Greeks and Trojans putting on fighting displays, whilst in the waters Roman Galleys will fight mock battles with Carthagenians to amuse those traversing the bridge,utter TRIPE).......
which are raised one meter above motor vehicle lanes for safety. The bridge is designed to be an experience and destination in itself with an estimated 150,000 to 300,000 traveling daily and 500,000 persons at peak seasons and special days of the year......................
(well those might be real figures,the Africans'd all go on the march to move to Spain and France)
At the three mile wide center of the bridge is a floating island which contains 150 windmills
(All that sucking and blowing they must intend to install the U.S. government there,complete with the American Senate pages and White House interns),
the world’s largest enclosed convention and exhibition area 2 kilometers long, 140 meters high, 250 meters wide with 23 floors at 20 meter ceiling height with 500,000 meters squared on each floor and 1 million square meters of total parking space...
(always add a convention center, that's what attracts U.S. financing,provided you have local strip clubs,yes, sure build it and they will come, just look at Dubai,can't get tourists there,why ever should they come to see a bridge..?)....
The island is a veritable city flanked by 120 meter high light houses, outdoor performance plazas, theaters, giant outdoor bazaars
(bazaars..........the whole plan is bizarre)
and food markets, rolling hills of grass, flowers, trees, parks, water lagoons, bays, 50 meter high waterfalls and fountains, drinking and feeding troughs for animals, bathrooms, giant tented markets and kiosks, two large marinas for boats and tourist ships, photovoltiac solar electricity farms, constructed wetlands for raw sewage and grey water and ecological desalination plants
(Well, now they've gone to building a city,t'was supposed to be a bridge).
Similar accommodations are located at the bridge ends as it joins Tarifa and Point Cires...
(Yes, and don't forget the signs-Accommodation,Food,Fuel,Next Exit).....
The structure of the bridge is a series of fish-shaped sections.......
(oh but they're showing no mercy here are they,fish entire project is fishy)......,
like the vertebrae of a spinal column, which are attached and locked, in overlapping fashion,...
(Overlapping.....Clinker built, just like the entire plan,chuck bung full of clinker)...
to one another by giant water-proof criscrossing cables in four directions. The sections are prefabricated on land and floated out in sections to their position. Certain sections have a water ballast area that fills with water and sinks to a calculated depth....
(Won't have to ,the whole project won't float)....
When the bridge is set in place the cables are tightened and the entire bridge is locked in place to form an arch in plan....
(arch, yes, notice not an architect in the plan anywhere to be seen)......
and an undulating tube in section...
(Nay! Not undulating like some giant dildo?Well, we're getting screwed here.Well, he is Chinese, and all those things come from China)......
The Island portion of the bridge floats on a series of hexagonally braced floating pontoons 60 meters wide...
(War surplus I suppose)......
The specially design lattice system allows the island to absorb wave and wind action. It is flexible to diffuse stresses pushing upon it. A triple cable system is employed in case a single cable breaks which would be highly improbable...
(Yes, improbable, but not the probable seems mentioned)....
So far, no cable bridges have ever broken...
(That's because there haven't been any built of cable, rope,sisal, and vines yes, and they have broken, but none of cable since they haven't done it yet, no, they've used other designs)......
There will be a period of tightening and adjusting and then the bridge will be in place forever....
(only in the minds of idiots in mental wards and houses).......
The bridge is made of waterproof concrete, electrolytic concrete, stainless steel and anodized aluminum.......
(Is made of?Is made of?Ha! Not been made yet, nor will it be,just look at that,IS made of).......
Air passes rapidly through the underwater sections through a phenomenon called the Venturi effect where higher air is attracted to closed spaces and accelerates through these spaces to create a natural airflow and constant exchange of air with no mechanical power needed.....
(Yes, just like farts through the minds of the plan's designers)....
All along the bridge are many areas for rest, music and dance performances....
(oh God! Not Morris Dancers too!).......,
kiosks and open market bazaars.....
(They're sucking up to the Arabs here, employ a few in a fake Casbah, but notice no chippies or curry take-outs........bad planning there.................and like the French built Versailles of the Thousand rooms.....no toilets mentioned in the entire plan,anywhere).......
Flowers, trees, pools and waterfalls separate pedestrians from motor vehicles......
(Never work, pedestrians would get mowed down like people at an Arab bombing,no barrier at all really)....
It is a true extension of both African and European cultures come together on a road 14.5 kilometers long (9 miles) in the middle of the Mediterranean Sea...
(They're right there, no Spaniard or Arab driver will ever yield way).....
A spectacular setting with the smells, sights and sounds of European and African cultures stir the imagination....
(Beans,Mushrooms and Fallafel will do it every time)...
However there was and is yet another plan,much less idiocy,much less grandiose,much less costly.....................let's have a look at that one, it is much more sane however,so we're now moving from the ridiculous to the sublime
The last attempt at a bridge designed to span the Strait of Gibraltar was a design by U.S. engineer T.Y.Lin......
(Another Chinese)...
in 1986 which would require three support pylons one mile high and footings that plunge to the sea bottom one half mile down underwater and then sink an additional quarter of a mile destroying the existing ecology of the sea bottom surrounding it significantly disturbing the marine environment of the area.....
(On the other hand they didn't think that creating a kilometers long and wide island would crush and destroy anywhere near the amount of marine life that a few dozens of feet thick and broad pylons would do)....
Lin’s design was based on previous traditional bridge concepts and was similar to the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco enlarged to five times its original size. Currently, the longest existing bridge is the Seto Ohashi Kojima bridge 13.22 kilometers long and built in 1988 for $8.3 billion dollars. It does not float..
(I have that sinking feeling ,but pity this is the only design that could float, and so,they've ignored it without a doubt)...
Tsui’s design is revolutionary in that it floats....
(Only in his mind)..,
completely eliminating the need for and cost of, giant support pylons and the tremendous and dangerous labor cost of constructing giant footings in place....
(He seem to prefer thousands of Chinese coolies).....
His bridge design is also held together....
(mentally,no doubt).......
in tension....
(definitely under Mental tension)......
instead of compression making it much more able to absorb and dissipate stresses pushing and pulling on it...
(Note the use of psychiatric terminology)....
When asked about how he developed the concept he states, “I asked myself how nature would create a bridge to span the Strait of Gibraltar and this is the result. I have formed a partnership with nature and discovered nature’s power to design and problem solve far surpasses all the computers on earth.”.....
(Now this really explains why his plan could and would never possibly work).
But now let's get serious here...............
Myself, Secret Squirrel,being constructive,and of sound mind,firmly grounded in reality, I would modify Lin's plan, and combine a touch of Tsui's plan, in that it would be best to create three small islands,but not floating islands, actually islands, easily by constantly dumping rock etc landfill in the required areas until the island required emerges for us to use. It works, it worked for the construction of the Expo 67 islands in the midst of the st. Lawrence River, using landfill rock from the city of Montreal's then being constructed subway system, so the system of constructing artificial islands most definitely does proveably work.Obviously thence islands whose construction would not impact marine life in the slightest as in their construction all marine life would go round and those misfortunately trapped beneath the island constructions would be crushed and so not exist as such, much as Tsui's massive floating island would do, and they,the constructed islands, would be impervious to the sea's poundings and the sea rage crash happiness of French and German captains, and on those islands we could install the electric generator windmill pylons needed to generate electricity just as did Lin's plan. Of course, such pylons could be made much more sound then as well, thus adding to the bridge's stability and strength.In short,my plan is yet much more sound,cheaper, and actually workably viable....but then again, why don't they just simply go with a tunnel??
Secret Squirrel
M.R.L.
Minister Of Re-Deranged Re-Engineering
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